As i walked through the streets of Malingo, with my head facing the ground and my body feeling too heavy for me carry, my feets took very short steps and I heard whispers of people calling my name and I could feel that they were pointing fingers at me. Before I could realise, some shot at me with oranges and over ripe mangoes. That used to be a street where each time I passed, I could barely breath with hugs and love from fans as they sang my songs, took pictures and videos with me and called their friends to come see me. WHAT WENT WRONG? I’ll tell you!
I’ve been a music lover ever since I was 5. I could play back and repeat almost every choreography of every song that was trending then till when I was I2. At 12, I realised I had the interest to write my own songs; well, I had a music book where i wrote all of my songs each time I got inspired and that happened through out secondary school. Every one in my class knew I was going to be an artist because my passion for it and talent was evident.
I got into the university and I dropped school. Who wants to wake up every morning to attend lectures when I can smoke weed, drink alcohol and meet up with studio sessions.. I had a few friends and it may interest you to know we smoked and drank together almost every time and I can say I had no one who acted as an eye opener. We were all the same. For 2 years, I invested all I had in music. The fees I collected from my mom(she had no idea I had dropped school), my house rents and every change I made as a hustler but money didn’t come.
I was so much in haste to “blow”. I wanted to be famous, i wanted to get all the girls that mattered, I wanted that life, yes! I wanted fame. I joined “ngess”(scamming) for easy cash so I could meet up with studio sessions and the life I wanted for my self. Money came, much money came, I shot good videos, had it all and became famous. I did free shows, I knew I had enough and didn’t need the change that came from event and show organisers in exchange for my performance.
I didn’t invest in any thing. I knew money from scamming was always gonna come. I spent on every expensive thing you can think of. Shoes, clothes, drinks, expensive apartments, vacations in various parts of the country and I realized that I didn’t have the time to concentrate on scammimg any more. I wanted a bigger deal. It came… but I guess they didn’t tell me all that was involved and even if they did at the beginning, I am sure it wouldn’t have mattered. I was desperate.
We didn’t sign any contracts yet. I was fully dependent on this deal and I so much wanted to be a part of their team. Too much was involved that my eyes couldn’t see..
Long story short…. My mom died. Yes I gave her up to stay relevant.
I’m gay and I’m suffering from liver cancer. I’m also a drug addict and it’s bad because I can’t afford it. Some one I once helped has given a room to live in, he gives me food some times and I can’t afford medical attention. I guess my days here are numbered.
This is me on the streets of Malingo being shamed and disgraced. Every one knows my story, they hate me, they blame me but time is way passed for regrets.
I can’t eat my cake and have it and it’s worst cuz I can’t bake another one; I don’t own an oven and I am too sick to bake.
Mean while, who is buying me Liquor and coke? I’m already gone so I may as well just drink and sniff till death comes for me.